Tag Archives: Svalbardi

Hunting ‘Unicorn’: Svalbarði hoping participants on reality TV investment show pull trigger on 800-kroner iceberg water


In the first-ever episode of “The Apprentice” a guy tried to win a lemonade stand challenge by charging $1,000 a glass in the hope of making a single sale (he failed and was fired soon afterward). So by comparison, asking ordinary folks if they’re cool paying a mere $100 for a bottle of Svalbarði’s “super-premium” iceberg water ought to be a smooth sell.

Doomsday scenarios: Impending collision with Planet X, ‘flooded’ seed vault, toilet paper famine among Svalbard’s 10 strangest stories of 2017


“There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened.”

― Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe


We feel safe saying after 2017 we’re now living in an alternate universe.

Random weirdness for the week of Sept. 26, 2017


Hmmm…this week we’ve got the military strutting its stuff in our non-militarized haven, the mayor worrying tourism will soon be as unpopular as mining (at a time when many local pols are rooting for boom times in both industries) and outrage in Hong Kong about the exorbitant prices of our local “super premium” Svalbarði bottled glacier water. So which to lead off with? Well, since a real newspaper would go with the item most likely to significantly affect the most people reading this (and in this case the plural reference may be overly optimistic), we’re obviously starting with the water weirdness…

Random weirdness for the week of Sept. 12, 2017


The sight of gunshot-riddled reindeer carcasses hanging from what’s normally a swing set at Kullungen Kindergarten is yet another reminder Svalbard is a right-wing conservative haven, no matter what stereotypes they have about Norway being an Arctic version of North Korea.

‘Would you pay £80 for a bottle of WATER?’ Svalbarði’s big-time success also means big-time scorn


Plenty of folks are toasting Jamal Qureshi’s success, although most probably aren’t doing it with his product. Plenty are indifferent about the rich choosing to literally piss their money away. And plenty are predictably reacting with ridicule and rage.

Random weirdness for the week of July 12, 2016


Svalbard Bryggeri may have generated most of the buzz during the past year when it comes to local liquids, but the frozen chosen dudes in the photo above managed to make some folks woozy by selling (yes, lots of people are actually buying it) local glacier water at for 300 kroner for a 750ml bottle (tip: you’d need to bring a few for this hike).

Briefs from Svalbardposten for the week of May 24, 2016


400 kr. for a 750ml bottle of ‘luxury’ local water ‘not a lot’
Anyone in Svalbard can drink locally sourced water merely by turning on a tap – or melting ice or snow – but Jamal Qureshi says he believes plenty of people will be willing to pay 400 kroner for a 750-milliliter bottle of his water from the archipelago.

Random weirdness for the week of Oct. 13, 2015


Great…now when the most spoiled of our tourists pee on our public landmarks they’ll boast they’re vastly enhancing the value of those structures. We’re assuming they’ll be filling their bladders with a new brand of ” premium luxury” bottled water made from ice collected from our glaciers that will cost 300 kroner for a 750-ml bottle.