Who charted? Discover the people and places that truly rank with Icepeople’s Alternative Walking Tour of Longyearbyen

Read Time:51 Second

(Oops…we just learned we published this before the actual map was actually uploaded. We’re sorting this out….stand by. Meanwhile, a somewhat readable version, explanation of what this is and a plea for money is at https://www.facebook.com/groups/261561222442/10152930783602443.)

We get it. You’re one of the cattle. But you don’t want to feel like one of the cattle.

Coming off a cruise ship with 4,000 people it’s hard not to feel everyone in Longyearbyen is trying to milk you while following the herd aimlessly because…well, they must be going somewhere interesting.
So you stumble through the overcrowded museum, shops and pubs, and get back on the ship trying to convince yourself you had a great time in the extreme Arctic.

So we say screw the classic so-called sights and sites. Do any of the pictures in this box move you? They should – and if you read our exclusive alternative tour map in the center of this week’s fishwrapper you’ll learn why.

About Post Author

Mark Sabbatini

I'm a professional transient living on a tiny Norwegian island next door to the North Pole, where once a week (or thereabouts) I pollute our extreme and pristine environment with paper fishwrappers decorated with seemingly random letters that would cause a thousand monkeys with a thousand typewriters to die of humiliation. Such is the wisdom one acquires after more than 25 years in the world's second-least-respected occupation, much of it roaming the seven continents in search of jazz, unrecognizable street food and escorts I f****d with by insisting they give me the platonic tours of their cities promised in their ads. But it turns out this tiny group of islands known as Svalbard is my True Love and, generous contributions from you willing, I'll keep littering until they dig my body out when my climate-change-deformed apartment collapses or they exile my penniless ass because I'm not even worthy of washing your dirty dishes.

marksabbatini@yahoo.com

http://icepeople.net